Walking through large crowds in East Village:

Mabel: Blah blah blah thick.
Flo: What?
Mabel: Thick...
Flo: Wait what?
Mabel: THICK!!

In high, strangled voice: "Sorry, I couldn't laayast!"

me: fucking lesbians.

me: I have never seen better-dressed concert-goers.
brian (guy who gave me a beer on the train): yea, the feist fans are really fashionable.
me: It's like all the hipsters in Chicago are on this train.
brian: oh, look, those people down there have, like, 50 Coach bags in those shopping bags.
me: Can you imagine the headline if this train crashed? 'Entire population of hipsters in Chicago and 10,000 dollars in Coach bags wiped out in Metra crash"

Hmpfh, hipsters.

Says one hipster to her friend: I don't shop at Urban Outfitters. I can't afford anything there!
Says the hipster friend: Yea, when are they going to make an outlet for people like you?

me: that's an awful song to cover
Ugly: it was absolutely horrid

Ugly: i'm gonna give her some space
'fo she thinks i'm all up in her shiiiiit
me: hahah
you all up in huh GRRRRill.
Ugly: LOL

Mabel: No! My sandwich is NOT omniscient!

Taz: You know, that guy that paid like twice for his books? Cuz he's a freak...

Office person 1: Yeah, we're planning a very important program meeting right now.
Office person 2: You guys are all going to see Batman, aren't you?
Office person 1: Um yeah.

[13:52] Steven: do americans eat goat cheese?
[13:55] Flo: do goats eat american cheese?
[13:56] Steven: does cheese eat american goats?
[13:58] Flo: does american cheese eat goats?

Flo: You were idle all day on g-chat, so I thought you were unconscious in our apartment.

The night we both tripped, one after the other, in front of Jhumpa Lahiri's house

Famine Face

Mabel: Hahaha, you look funnier with that face.
Flo: How would you know?...The famine face looks funny on EVERYone.

Flo: Back to the salt mines......Leon, get out of the way!
Mabel: Yeah, we're trying to do our hair for the salt mines!

Peter: So my 15-year-old daughter said the funniest thing the other day. She said she and this other boy she hardly talks to are in an "open relationship."
Mabel: Hahaha. So they're seeing other people.
Peter: Yeah, they might as well, since they're not even seeing each other.

Flo: [staring at Pathmark receipt] What the heck is BBChamp? It was $4.00. Do you remember what BBChamp was?

Mabel: I don't own any professional work clothes.
Flo: Yeah, you look like a kid when you go to work.

---------------------------------------------------

"I don't understand, we're responsible and don't act like children...even though we are."

Flo: Why are your sweats on top of my work clothes?
Mabel: Those aren't mine. And that's a skirt.
Flo: I don't own skirts, so it's yours.
Mabel: Oh, yeah it is mine.
Flo: It's your party skirt.
Mabel: Yeah. [pause] I'm gonna put that in the wash...

Mabel: So, are they newly breds?
Flo: [wide-eyed, about-to-burst-into-laughter look)
Mabel: Newly grads?
[cue laughter]
Flo: Yes, they were just bred yesterday.

Miniature snowmen from the days of yore

"Why do YOU have the arms in this relationship?!"

"....and no one wore his PJ's."

Life in our Brickhouse

Flo: Why does that kitchen corner smell like homeless people?

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Phil: The door was unlocked, and then there was this SANDWICH on the counter...

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"We'll just say that we're sorry we invaded his space, but we never intended for it to happen, and we won't let it happen again...and that no one wore Joe's pj's."

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"Dude I hate how I have to compete with people outside my window to get heard inside my own house."

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Flo: People just don't understand what it's like to pay rent! And to have shopping competitions at Pathmark with your roommate to see who spends less!

me: lol i like in the email how she says, "you can email her after she gets up, after noon"
don't think she understands the function of digital communication
Flo: haha yeah
emailing her too early might wake her up
me: hahahah
exactly
Flo: man, i HATE when emails wake me up
Flo: almost as much as i hate food
me: that's awesome

Allison: wow ppl do not waste time when it comes to commenting on pics

me: hello hello!
Ugly: herro!
me: LOL
herro, herro!
Ugly: i'm ronery
so ronery!
hm, ronery.
me: aww, ronery ritto grrrrw.
Ugly: grrrw?
me: don yoo know? grrrww
how yu notta know dees?
Ugly: can i have a clue?
me: grrrrrrrrrrrrrWWWWl.
Ugly: LOL
me: eet is lika "dayaam, grwwwwl."
yu know dees?
Ugly: LOL
lmao
me: lol
yu steela loffink.
Ugly: you have a true talent in keyboard accents