Slutty Bookworms and Calcium Deficiency

Ugly: oh
so
0:18 when i hung out w/ ms fitz and jackson and everyone at sister's
we determined that you're a slutty bookworm
0:19 can't remember how the whole conversation went
Yo: HAHAHAHHAA
WHAT?!
lmao
now you have to tell me
Ugly: we were talking about dating i guess
Yo: uh huh
Ugly: somehow we got on to you
0:20 and someone says something like, "mabel dates women?" or something
and i said "she dates everyone"
"she's just slutty"
Yo: hahahha
nice
Ugly: and someone else says
0:21 "wow, i just think of her as a bookworm"
Yo: HAHAHA
who said THAT
Ugly: so msfitz says
"she's a slutty bookworm"
Yo: hahahhaa
nice way to put it

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Flo: are you taking vitamins at all?
Yo: ah know :(
nope
Flo: jesus
you're gonna die
Yo: LOL
Flo: are you drinking milk
drink lots of milk
22:55 Yo: not drinking too much milk
i normally don't drink that much milk
Flo: there you go
calcium deficiency
Yo: :(
mah bones be weak
Flo: you're gonna end up like those old grandmas who walk in 90 degree angles
Yo: LOL
Flo: i cant' imagine why that's funny
you're gonna ruin your life
22:56 do you wanna break your hip in the middle of sex?
cuz youd idn't have enough calcium
ther'es nothing worse than stopping during sex cuz someone broke her hip
Yo: hahahah
haha, imagine what my partner would think
"wow that must be some come"
22:57 Flo: "oh fuck, my penis broke her"

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googlyga: i think maybe some ice and elevation might work better
b/c if it's swollen, you don't want to hang it down in a tub of hot water
Yo: mmkay, well the ice is being made now
googlyga: all the blood will stay collected there
Yo: really
googlyga: hahahaha
Yo: oh okay
googlyga: "i am making the ice now"
Yo: haha
googlyga: ok there, mr. freize
Yo: hahahaha
22:38 wait, what about a tub of cold water?
googlyga: noooo no hanging!!
Yo: okay okay
googlyga: elevate!
Yo: how high should i elevate it?
googlyga: like...ugli chair level
22:39 Yo: LMAO
googlyga: heeeh
Yo: okay well now my leg is like at a 90 degree angle to my body
22:40 haha i love how you're my medical consultant
john my scottish friend is like "i can come over and do some spiritual healing"
googlyga: i think it should be good, as long as it's at/above the level of your heart
bwhawhahahahaha
Yo: hahahhaa
googlyga: with haggis?
Yo: thanks for being useful.
googlyga: don't do it, hubby!
22:41 Yo: i think it looks better now
googlyga: the least i can do =D

For Judy's Viewing Pleasure

Fernando: tu compi judy se las trae...
me dijo q era de singapur, la edad tb me la dijo mal, y que teníais dos compañeras, una inglesa y otra alemana...
Yo: hahaha
12:58 Fernando: vamos, no me dijo ni una verdad
Yo: hahahhaa
Fernando: jejeje
Yo: es de taiwan y tiene 23 años
Fernando: sip
lo de taiwan se lo saque
12:59 Yo: jejej
Fernando: se pensaba que no sabía donde estaba taiwan....
y cuando le digo q es una isla en la costa este china se me quedo mirando con una cara...
Yo: si, no sé, supongo que le gusta mentir a los chicos a veces
Fernando: se debe pensar q los españoles somos un poco tontos...
Yo: hahahahaha
13:00 Fernando: jaja
le gusta mentir un poco?
lo q no le gusta es decir la verdad...
Yo: jajaja
Fernando: pero vamos, está bien, es lo normal en ese tipo de noches
13:01 ahh
y me dijo una cosa de ti...
Yo: si?
Fernando: sip
y sin que yo le preguntara nada, eh
Yo: sobre qué?
Fernando: sobre como te gustaba que te besaran...
Yo: oooh
13:02 y de eso?
Fernando: q visto lo visto no sé si será verdad
no sé, me lo soltó sin más
le pregunte de qué os reíais y me lo dijo
13:03 Yo: jeje y?
13:04 haha, y lo que ella ha dicho sobre cómo me gusta besar, es verdad?
13:05 Fernando: espera, q me llamaban
no sé, me dijo algo así como que no te gustaba que te besaran con mucha lengua
o algo así
13:06 porque se partia de risa
Yo: jaja, ahh ya veo
13:07 si, es verdad
Fernando: ahh
al menos me dijo una verdad!
Yo: jejeje
13:08 Fernando: además esas cosas es buenas saberlas de antemano

Flexi-mouth

spunky azn 3: ur lips are like huge

spunky azn 3: i didn't remmeber them to be that big

spunky azn 3: lol

ablefires658: hahaha

ablefires658: hm i never noticed that

spunky azn 3: haha

ablefires658: i'm looking at it now

spunky azn 3: chinky eyes and them bam angelina jolie lips

ablefires658: haha

spunky azn 3: ok nvm ur eyes aren't all that chinky

ablefires658: i think i have a pretty big mouth

ablefires658: it's like a flexi-mouth

spunky azn 3: yeah whats that all about

spunky azn 3: flexi mouth?

spunky azn 3: haha

spunky azn 3: like snake jaws?

ablefires658: yeah

ablefires658: i can unhinge it

spunky azn 3: can u really ?

spunky azn 3: or are u just imagining it

spunky azn 3: haha

ablefires658: haha no

spunky azn 3: ahaha

spunky azn 3: i didn't think so

spunky azn 3: i thought i could unhinge my jaw but that was just my jaw locking up...

Eggs

john: Oh had half a dozen eggs reappear in the fridge, Vega had used them!!!

mabel: haha that's funny, she used your eggs

john: whats so funny

mabel: it just is for some reason

john: this place may be one of those places, what yours is mine and what is mine is mine

mabel: hahahaha
but did she not realize those were your eggs

john: don't know, but hey there is now half a dozen eggs in the fridge

mabel: but you didn't talk to her about the eggs

john: so i can cook myself a vegie omlete over the weekend woohhhhhhh
no I didn't talk to anyone other than you about the eggs

mabel: hahahahha
this conversation is getting funnier and funnier

john: yes and all we are talking about is eggs

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john: Or even comment on the new book by M Lee - How to get a man by thinking like a man

Ugly: what u doin?
me: lesson plannin'
Ugly: u say it like ur goin surfin
me: haha why yes, it is surfin'
it's surfin' the net for other people's lessons to steal
Ugly: niiiiiice

Fond Memories

FatWhiteKid264: you were freaking out
omg
the chair
it was over here
now it's over there
yes, jim moved it so you could sit
NO
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND SHANE
IT WAS HERE
NOW IT'S THERE

me: LOL OMG
yeah i was so high

dinner at kyotofu:

kellye: [looking at the check] oh look, the waiter even wrote his name at the bottom

megan: "hoji" is the name of my tea.